Teeth Chattering in Praha

Prague was bizarre. I had no presumed expectations about its culture. When we arrived at the train station on Thursday, everything and I mean Everything was illegible. Czech is a clash between Russian, Polish and extremely unfamiliar vernacular inflections. They have a lot of V’s and swirl-y things over their letters and the words aren’t pronounced near anything you could wildly imagine. “J’s” sound like “Y,” “C” sounds like “S,” and the umlauts create clutter. In the midst of all this confusion, we then had to change our currency to Crowns. The American dollar is equal to 17.9 CZK. For once, it felt rewarding to get more for my money.

Our seven-bed hostel turned out to be unexpectedly spacious. But….the sheets were blue, grungy and faded. There always seems to be a flaw. I hate to sound opinionated (refer to previous sentence), but Prague didn’t activate any sort of “WOW” for me. We arrived at night and I thought it was going to be as wondrous as the charming castle that lit up a distant hill.

My friend and I went on a walking tour with an explorer who made Prague more interesting that it probably really is. He was one of those guys who get in a bar fight in Budapest, make untamed jokes that only people like me find hilarious, and somehow impresses ALL with his wit-infused historical knowledge. We were clearly in an ancient city, especially evident when you get lost in Old Town Square. We visited the Prague castle (pražskỳ hrad) and walked across the Charles Bridge to see the Astronomical clock, Tỳnskavlička Church, Powder Gate and the good ol’ Jewish Quarter. It was very Jew-y, but I felt no remorse with having little concern for it. I’m tired of hearing about the Nazis. Get over yourself, Auschwitz!

We met two British girls in our hostel and ended up going to a pub crawl where we later met even more Brits. Humans who speak English are a lot easier to chat with. Meeting people from every single country in Europe was more promising than the free liquor they over-marketed. We paid 250 CZK for BOXED wine, watered-down rum shots, and lethal injections of Absinthe. It tasted like a bad decision. The pub crawl was mostly a bunch of 18 year old Americans who were studying abroad and losing every last one of their inhibitions. College would be less exhilarating without a few cocktails here and there. We crawled to 1 ½ pubs and 2 ½ clubs until 5 AM only to discover this was not the city of lights or after-dark public transportation. And the taxi drivers take their giant-sized cut with their no-meter having Benzes. Their metro system is similarly based on the integrity of its riders, but shuts down at midnight.

I will admit that Prague was beautiful in its own sort of “Beautiful Mind” way. It took me until the very last day to get in touch with my sense of feeling for the place. Maybe my sensory glands were frozen because it was insufferably chilly. But, Prague lacked that Western European tickle that you find in France and Germany. And I haven’t been to Eastern Europe, but my imagination has, and this city definitely felt like the Czechoslovakia that it is. There were steep Californian hills with small villages embedded in the skyline. Pointy architecture competed with the horizon. I felt no flirtation or nostalgia – the Czech nation was coy.
I’m on the train back to Berlin now. The views are priceless. I feel like I’m riding through a wonderland. I never thought returning to an uncomfortable bed without a temperpedic mattress pad could sound so good. Berlin is beginning to feel like home.

Upcoming adventures: A weekend in Cologne, Germany. After that, I’m going searching for my destiny in LONDON!!!!!!!!!! Expect seasoned vignettes.

Na Shledanou (Goodbye)...